The pain! The pain!

I've been back at work for nearly a month and it is hard! I work as a Customs Officer so there is a lot of walking - airports are big places.

When I started back after 3 months off, I did 4 hours a day with a day off in between. Then I went to four hours one day and six hours the next. I'm now doing six hours a day for a shift of 6 days with 3 days off to recover. Next week I'm back to full hours. 

It's 17 weeks since my op and I was hoping to be feeling a lot better by now. When I was at home on sick leave I was doing brilliantly but now I'm back at work I'm going backwards! I limp really badly. I've read that I shouldn't (a similar problem to me) but I can't walk any other way. I wear big steel capped boots for work which should support my ankle but maybe they are too heavy and are putting stress on it. The problem is I cannot work if I'm not wearing them. I usually have pain sitting around 3-4 and always feel like my ankle needs clicking back into place. I can't get the pain down below this even with tramadol or naproxen (or both when I'm really desperate). I also can't take tramadol when I'm working.

Today I was doing stuff around the house and suddenly my ankle went up to 8 on the pain scale. I'm back to thinking an amputation sounds good 😆. It isn't swollen; it just felt like someone was trying to cut through it with a blunt pair of scissors. I had to sit down immediately. My husband got me my crutch, which I hadn't used since my cast was taken off. I hobbled upstairs and put it up. He suggested that I use both crutches and be non-weight bearing but when the foot is suspended it feels like it's just hanging by a thread of skin.

I've read a lot of accounts from people who have had the surgery in other countries and they seem to have a much longer time in casts and non-weightbearing. Everyone seems to have been in a cast, whereas I had the option of just being in a moonboot. I'm really nervous that I am doing damage or interfering with the healing because of my surgeon's quick return to weight bearing. It wasn't reassuring looking at the X-ray and being told it looks good but you can't really tell if it's fusing until the 6 month mark.

My work limits the aids I can use. I wasn't allowed back in a moonboot and I can't use crutches. Fortunately I'm able to do duties that involve sitting, avoiding the standing tasks. I'm feeling like I've lost myself really and wondering if it was a mistake to have the surgery. Ironically I am in so much more pain than I was presurgery and I am causing problems in other parts of my body because of the way the ankle forces me to move. My lower back often seizes up, my opposite hip that had had a steroid injection to reduce a bursitis is back to the same level of pain and difficulty lifting it and the cyst on the back of my opposite knee hasn't improved pain wise despite a steroid injection in it.

I tried contacting my surgeon to check up on whether I'm progressing normally but she was in theatre. Her receptionist said that she would pass on my message via an email that I sent but she doesn't appear to be the best with technology. I haven't heard anything and it's been a week so I'm going to have to chase it up, which I hate doing. The pain makes me irritable and I get more intolerant of people. I'm turning misanthropic and totally relate to Sartre's quote "Hell is other people."

So life is not being a bowl of cherries but I'll just keep hobbling along.

The thing about using one leg

I have already talked about my poor left knee suffering under the weight of being the soul usable leg.

A couple of days after the ultrasound that definitely diagnosed my Bakers cyst, (which had ruptured and was separating my calf muscles!) my GP phoned. She told me what I already knew but was more inclined to refer me for a steroid injection than she had been at my first appointment. She put a referral through for an aspiration of my Baker’s cyst and a steroid injection.

I rang through to make my appointment. The receptionist said that they only had one radiologist on that week and he hadn’t done this procedure. Did I want to see him or wait until next week when the other doctors will be back on board? Ah, waiting please.

So today I went in for an ultrasound and treatment of the Baker’s cyst. The radiologist was happy to do the steroid but didn’t think aspiration would be necessary. So I had a nice shot of local into the top (not the back) of my knee and then he removed the syringe and put the steroid syringe on so no double dipping around.

So now I’m back home and of course it feels great because the local is doing its thing. I went from a 6 to a 2 on the pain scale, only my calf hurt. Unfortunately it’s going to wear off in a few hours and then it’ll take about 36-48 hours for the steroid to kick in. During that time period I’m likely to get my cast off so some light weight bearing might start so poor old lefty will have a bit less of a load to bear. It was naturally happier when I used my knee crutches rather than fore arm crutches. There was also no way it could propel me up stairs. It could not do the nice pop up.

I haven’t tried since the steroid went in. 

The other problem I encountered was I fell, a lot! My left leg would just go on strike. Most times it was no problem. I tried to step over a speed bump in our driveway and ended up sprawled on the ground. I had to take the crutch off, hard when you’re splayed, stand up with no support and put it back on.  No real injuries following that or any inside falls. The only damaging fall was on a bus, which was stationary. I pivoted around and crashed to the ground. In the process I managed to push my right knee sideways (a trick of mine) and sprain my right shoulder. Because I bruise easily anyway and I’m on aspirin I developed some lovely bruises. My shoulder is still sore but everything else is fine.